So this isn’t my first blog post, but it might as well be!! I started this blogging journey, oh about 5 years ago. (Haha) Ya… back when my husband was my boyfriend, I had 2 kids and now I have 3! Life is crazy, unexpected and fragile. I have been through some tragic moments, sad moments and some of the most beautiful, take your breath away moments. We all have! This is how I’ve decided to remember, relish and face them. Not only am I trying to create and outlet for this crazy life, but I am seeing if I can take a crack at making some side money from it! Wish me luck!!
So, apparently to have a blog, let alone attempt to make some “side monies” …you have to promote it! Ya, that’s a thing guys! And, if we are being honest, which this is a “platform of honesty”. Promoting means, using that little thing called Social Media! Whhhhhaaaaaaa??!! People…. I SUCK at social media! No joke! I have spent a majority of my life raising my kids to “PUT DOWN YOUR PHONE!!” – “No phones at the table” – “You are NOT allowed on Snapchat!!” – “Give me your phone!” You guys, seriously, I will spare you, this goes on for a decade… Soooooo, you can join in the humor my husband finds that I want to Blog! Hahaha, I find it funny too! Also, just a heads up, I find myself way funnier that I really am. And I am totally okay with it! Alright, so back to social media… what am I doing?? I am really struggling with this. Sounds ridiculous, I know. The part of my blog that has to do with cooking, I GOT THAT! I mean, I feed my family and LOVE cooking! BOOM! Traveling… who doesn’t love that! My first trip to Africa was when I was in the 4th grade. Wonderlust is in my bones! I love being a stay-at-home mom, crafting my face off, drinking champagne (said in a British accent) Buuuut, I am not good at being on the interwebs all the time. Let alone, some of the time. With the new-ish iPhone update, my phone told me my screen time was up 79% from last week! Whoop whoop! I GOT THIS!! Then I saw the small print, “thats 12 min more than last week” (if you could see my facial expression it would match this)
Are you wondering what I am doing also?? Haha, hence my dilema. But really, I am excited to be doing this. I have been thinking, wanting, processing this for years now! Apparently my stars are in alignment, the moon is in its correct phase, my children are grown and I finally have some time to figure out what I want to be when I grow up! HAHAHAHA, wait… kids grown up!?! Nope, reality check! I JUST STARTED OVER!! (insert drinking Champagne) Now, don’t for 1 second get the thought that I didn’t want, don’t want or regret my little chunkcake. He completes my life circle. I LOVE HIM!! YOU would LOVE him!! Buuut, it has come with its challenges. Postpartum depression is a real thing. (that is self diagnosed, I keep my emotions in check and don’t go to the doctors unless I think Im dying) And now that I put that in my little inter thought bubble, I feel I should say, I wasn’t making light of postpartum depression. I didn’t go to the doctor, but I definitely don’t recommend that. I should’ve gone! The first year of Logan’s life, I struggled. A LOT!! Sleep deprivation!! No joke, is one of the worst things I’ve experienced. And I’ve had 2 back surgeries and have been ran over by a small pickup truck! (haha, true things) Anywho, aside from the fuzz bubble of severe sleep deprivation, I felt alone. And I wasn’t alone. I have a wonderful husband, helpful and hands on beyond measure. And 2 older girls that are, well… exceptional. (toot tooting my own horn over here) It wasn’t about help, or love or support. Frankly I don’t know what it was about. I will have to tap into that in another post. Lets just run with I had a really rough year. In that rough year of starting over it made me realize, I can’t be the mom to Logan that I was to the girls. And that brakes my heart a bit. See the struggle, she has to die, be laid to rest, go bye bye. Seriously, I can’t. I had Alexis when I was 22, and Mikinzee when I was 26. And a husband that was, well… I am going to choose my words wisely here and say, we are divorced. Needless to say, I sacrificed college, career and a lot of my self for those girls. Again, no regrets! I was able to stay home the first half of their life. Work the middle part of their lives, now I am back home. Which is super important to me, still is! I am very lucky that my hubby finds deep value in my staying home too and being hands on with our kids. Really, it is priceless. But staying home isn’t for everyone. It is a tough job. My sanity is out the window a lot of the time. I don’t get to pee alone, I have a little duckling that follows me everywhere. Oh how I remember those day, and here I am again. 12 years older. Ya, momming is hard. Then again, so is going to work and juggling a family. God bless working moms! I’ve been there too. My house fell apart. I felt like I was just living Groundhogs Day, over and over and then over again! I just couldn’t catch up it seemed like. But life has a way of working itself out. And hopefully you listen when life tells you to take a seat. Because if you don’t, it will knock you down. One way or anther. I have always been pretty good about stopping for a moment and having some reflection on where I am at. And even then, life has a way of stopping you if you don’t pay attention. Reminds me I have to slow down. So this is how I am doing it.
I hope you guys check in every once in a while. I hope you enjoy listening to my musings, rants, photos and recipes. Really, try the recipes guys. My photos aren’t so great, and don’s show the food justice. But Im working on that. LOL I’ll dial that in… eventually! Comment, email, collaborate, follow… blog with me!! Until next week!!
P.S. Learning Italian is on my Bucket List =)
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