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Holiday Blues

November 30, 2018 // By: Jeanne
Posted In: Musings // Leave a comment... Be the first!

Tis’ the season for Joy and Merriment! But, to be honest, tis’ also the season for sadness and heartache.

So many emotions and feeling get all tangled up like a ball of christmas lights. First, you plug them in and are SO excited they work! Then the little tingles of excitement you get, from just how pretty and magical, these lights are! The house, the tree, the mantle!! It’s ALL going to be wonderment! To then, you sit back and see what a mess of entanglement you have ahead of you. Who put these lights up last year anyways!! And to make it worse, as you untangle said mess,  the lights flicker on and off…What,  UGH!! WTF!?! Ya, kind of sums up life. You really can’t have one, without the other.

In my experience, the Holidays bring up all of that. It is hands down, my favorite time of year! But man, do my emotions FLY!! ———–> (there they go) I know loss, a lot of it. I found the blessing in my dysfunctional family. I have 4 parents, none of whom are together. So lets consider them 4 sets of parents (not going to get into my family forest) With each set, they have parents. So in return… I was blessed with SO many grandparents (8)  It. Was. Awesome!! I loved them as all my grandparents, they loved me as their grandchild! Throughout the years, I’ve lost all of them. Then mix in other family and a few friends, sadness can set in. They holidays remind me the most, of the times we had together. It also reminds me of my last Christmas I had with my dad. He hung on, until January 4th. So I have that. We had him for Christmas! But the struggle we went through that December rushes back every holiday season. I miss him terribly this time of year.

Then after a terrible fight with breast cancer, my cousin lost her life January 13, 2014. She too fought to hang on through the holidays. So again, there is that! Which I am beyond thankful for. We LOVED the holidays. Life got crazy and that was the one time a year, if all else failed, we came together to enjoy it with our families. But the holidays are forever changed when your favorites aren’t around.

I really could go on… we all could. Tis the Season! It is time for families and friends to come together and enjoy and reflect on the year(s) past. And with reflection we realize, we all are missing something and a lot of “someones” and what do we do with all those emotions? Nothing brings back our loved ones or past decisions and regrets. Lord knows we all have those! And again, the holidays are a reminder of all things “feelings” good and not so good. It’s reality, right?!

Are you wondering “why” am I writing this post? What a Debbie downer! Haha. That’s not my intention. As we are on the last day of November, I was thinking about all of the things I want to do in December and how I want to transition into the new year, 2019!! How is it going to be 2019?? I naturally think about my dad, cousin, grannie… so on. Then I think about current family and friends and how relationships change throughout the years. I really do focus more on the positive and how great life is. But sometimes, focusing on the latter, gets the best of me. And I am okay with that. I have a pretty good balance of emotions. Hasn’t always been that way. But over all, it’s me. And 2018 has been a transition into who I am. And I can’t wait for 2019 to really embrace what that means. (its a surprise for me too, haha) I am a firm believer you DO have to look and reflect back on your past in order to move forward. As hard or ugly as it is, that where you find yourself. Your “why”?! Why did I make that choice/decision? So much of it comes down to that simple question. Whether or not you initiated the the first choice/decision or responded to someone else’s. I find that is what it comes down to. And for some reason, my timing of reflection on past decisions, relationships, choices, whatever, is now. Right smack in the middle of the holidays. Go me!

As I am looking back, at all of the decisions that have brought me to this point in my life. I realize, I really am thankful for all good and bad decisions and events that have happened in my life. I have very minimal regrets, if any. Having that outlook didn’t come easy. And it cost me, a lot. Cost me a lot personally, and it came at the cost of others. Which, I am remorseful for, but try not to regret. You can grow and expand your heart from remorse, but you have to forgive yourself and be able to move on.  I feel, that remorse is the starting point, then pick yourself up and move on from it. (easier said then done, I know) Otherwise, it’s hindering and debilitating. I have seen regret, stop people from living, and cost them happiness. And regret and guilt travel pretty close together. And guilt is a plague, that spreads out to the people you care for the most, and tears you apart. Accepting mistakes or unplanned paths is part of your life’s journey. And it’s beautiful. Scars can be beautiful, if you just change a little perspective. They are the roadmap to the core and center of your person. What is more beautiful than that! And what is more beautiful than letting other people in on your struggles to help them feel a little more normal. Life these days are seen through “rose colored glasses” called Instagram/Facebook or whatever other social platform there is. It’s all a filter. I find most connected to the ones that show bits of their true self and life. That inspires me and I feel inspired to maybe do that for someone. Even if it is just one person. Because I realize as great of a life as I do have, it’s not all roses. I struggle, quite a bit at times.

This is my way of finding center. I come from a family of dysfunction but that doesn’t mean I set out to live my life in dysfunction. I was getting married once and staying with the man that I had children with. Come hell or high water! Well, the hell and the highest of water came and went and came and went…. So ya, never tell life it isn’t going to be a certain way. Your challenges, will always be your challenges until you actually stop and face them. It is in that moment they will dissipate. (insert divorce here)  And let me tell you how freeing and liberating that moment is. The cloudy skies part, the sun beams through and it all makes perfect sense. It hurts like a son of bitch!! But WOW! It is GLORIOUS! And it starts a chain reaction, if you let it (choices) and it becomes contagious. And then you (re)find the man of your dreams!! Whoop Whoop! Haha

So if you’re struggling with the Holiday Blues or just any blues. You’re not alone. Even though, that is most likely, exactly how you feel. (say that 5x) Chin up buttercup. This moment, is always the best moment, to forgive yourself and start down a new path. So while we are all (most) in full holiday mode, and life is, or can be, more emotional. I hope we all turn to the happier side of emotions and enjoy this wonderful time of year. Look around and be thankful for all your little blessings. This season comes once, but it is over in a heartbeat. All the time and money and attention to detail and time and MONEY that goes into, what, a month and a half period of time! Make sure you slow down to do all of the things that make you happy. And thoroughly enjoy them and the family and friends around you. Make it as perfect or imperfect as you want. Just spread Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa Cheer… or just spread Cheer if you don’t celebrate anything. Someone is deeply struggling for their, very personal to them, reasons. So let’s spread holiday cheer!!

Tomorrow is December 1st. Let the festivities begin. I’m kicking off my December with a “Winter Wine Walk” in downtown Ventura! Then a tree lighting on Sunday at Church! What are you doing to enjoy the most of your December? I would LOVE to hear about it!!

About Jeanne

I’m Jeanne – cook, photographer, momma of 3, and lover of all things homemade, especially tacos! I started Passion & Poppies because I wanted a way to catalog my kitchen and life endeavors.
I love to stay connected to my readers! You can find me on Instagram, Pinterest or Facebook.

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My friend was at the beach a little while back, an
My friend was at the beach a little while back, and saw this set up. How awesome and sweet is this! 
♥️
Today, my hubby and I are celebrating our 5 year wedding anniversary. Our engagement wasn’t elaborate like this, but it was our own kind of magic, and maybe a little awkward. 😂 
For those of you who don’t know, I’ve known my husband since we were 8 years old. He was my first crush, one of my best friends growing up, and my favorite person. Life happens, different paths were taken, so on and so forth. But always remained a favorite person. He is genuinely and factually, one of the most amazing men on the planet. 
Long story short, he obviously came back into my life, lucky me, and we’ve been connected ever since. 
I tell you all of that, to help understand the awkward silence that came over me when he got down on one knee and said “will you marry me?” ..... I do not know how long I didn’t speak, move or anything. (I’m going to have to ask him) The only thing I know is that I’ve never had an out of body experience, until that day. I felt like I was floating, observing what was going on. The slight breeze, the water running under the bridge, and my most favorite person down on one knee asking someone... wait is that me?! Did he just ask me to marry him? Am I dreaming? I’m dreaming... awe... I love him... and then I hear, with a shaky voice “Babes, is that a yes?” 
Oh snap! This is real! And then I finally say “YES!!” Then I leaped at him, almost knocked him over and I’m sure at that point made him feel better. And hopefully every day since, he knows and feels like the center on my universe. 
♥️
Where do you get engaged? And what’s your love story? 
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#love #anniversary #engagement #wedding #lovestory #myfavorite #proposal

• Chocolate Croissant • It probably a good thi
• Chocolate Croissant • It probably a good thing I do not know how to make these! 
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One of the many things I love about staying at the Avila La Fonda, in Avila Beach. Waking up to fresh baked chocolate croissants. 🥐 
The smell is amazing and taste delicious 🤎
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#travel #croissant #chocolate #freshbaked #travel #avilabeach #lafonda #celebrate #breakfast #morningvibes

Jarcuterie and Champagne make the perfect afternoo
Jarcuterie and Champagne make the perfect afternoon snack in between wine tasting. ❤️ 🧺 
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#jarcuterie #picnic #champagne #lajolie #charcuterie #travel #socal #california #winetasing #anniversary

• Carnitas Tacos • If I had to choose one meal
• Carnitas Tacos • If I had to choose one meal to eat for the rest of my life, it just might be tacos! And most likely these tacos! 
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Thank you @mattkolo for your recipe! It’s bomb.com!! 
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The hubby and I have dialed in this recipe and I promise it doesn’t disappoint. Right down to the crispy bits that make this over the top!! 
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Recipe is on the blog, link in bio, search Carnitas Tacos or 
www.passionandpoppies.com/the-best-carnitas-tacos 
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#tacos #tacotuesday #wednesday #carnitas #pork #instantpot #instapot #dinner #easydinnerideas #foodie

Whelp, I can’t write straight. 😂
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I decided

Whelp, I can’t write straight. 😂 
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I decided to hand letter on the wrapping paper for my hubby’s anniversary gift. As you can tell, it’s been a while since I’ve practiced writing.
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#handlettering #handwriting #moderncalligraphy #anniversary #gifts #lettering #write

• The Craft House • It isn’t just a place I
• The Craft House • It isn’t just a place I sell my candles out of. Nor is it just a place I go to escape the groundhogs day of life. 
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This place is awesome! I’m proud of my sister-in-law and the space she has worked so hard to create. The DIY Craft Bar is one of my favorite aspects of this place. Who doesn’t love painting and sipping!? Plus, all the handmade products from local makers, make some of the best gifts. 
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It’s 21 and over, which mean you can have a beverage! And it also means no kids, which in turn means freedom! 🙌🏼 Win, win. (Swipe to the last photo to see what she has on tap)
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She does however have “Take and Make” kits for kids and adults, which Logan loves.  I love them too, because gives me a little bit of silence at home. #winning (Swipe to see Logan’s fish tank) 
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If you haven’t been here, I highly recommend you check it out. The seasonal crafts and products don’t last long. Believe me, the gnomes go quickly! 
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Store hours are posted on the website or go to website to order online:
www.thecrafthouse805.com or check out @thecrafthouse805 
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#thecrafthouse805 #thecrafthouse #paintnsip #diy #craftbar  #beer #wine #champagne #makers #makersgonnamake

• French Macarons • Have you tried these?? Def
• French Macarons • Have you tried these?? Definitely one of my favorite little treats. They have their quirks when making them, but totally worth it. But not difficult., just a little time consuming. 
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The first time I made these, as you can tell, they look like little burgers. The heart sprinkles helped I think. ❤️🤍 
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I have the recipe up on the blog. Will be updating it with some tips and tricks that I’ve learned. Will keep you posted when those are up. But check it out and I hope let me know if you make them, or have made them. Tips always welcomed! 
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Link in bio, search French Macarons. Or 
www.passionandpoppies.com/French-Macarons 
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Recipe from Magnolia Journal. Thank you @joannagains 
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#frenchmacarons #macarons #pastries #dessert #homemade #magnoliajournal #joannagaines

• Corned Beef • Never have I ever… microwave
• Corned Beef • Never have I ever... microwaved corned beef!! And I’m not gonna lie, it wasn’t terrible!
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Hubby text me from Costco saying “this is all they have” with a photo of a microwaved corned beef. I didn’t respond fast enough, so it ended up in the cart. And well, we try really hard not to waste food. So yeah... we microwaved the shit out of it! Just kidding, it took like 7 minutes, and again, wasn’t bad. I am however looking forward to slow cooking the next one! 
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Do you like Corned Beef?
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#cornedbeef #costco #microwave #easydinner #dinnerideas

• Prosecco Cocktail with Berries and Lemon • C
• Prosecco Cocktail with Berries and Lemon • Cocktail or Mocktail, either way it’s delicious and reminds me of Spring. Light and refreshing, so in other words, it makes a great daytime beverage! 
🍋 
This is topped with Prosecco, which if you know me, I love my bubbles. Do you have any recipes that go with bubbles? Please share! 
🍓
Recipe on blog, link in bio. Search: Prosecco Cocktail. 
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#prosecco #cocktail #lemon #berries #beverage #vodka #weekend #friday

• Lemon Artichoke Pesto with Cauliflower Gnocchi
• Lemon Artichoke Pesto with Cauliflower Gnocchi •
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First off, cauliflower gnocchi has become a family favorite. Who would’ve thought?! 
Second, I tried to replicate a jar of artichoke pesto I had bought, and happy to say, we love this a lot too!! I used homegrown parsley instead of basil, so good! 
🌿 
Full recipe is on the blog, link in bio, search Lemon Artichoke Pesto or
www.passionandpoppies.com/lemon-artichoke-pesto
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#easydinner #dinner #pesto #gnocchi #cauliflower #artichoke

• Bacon Wrapped Jalapeño Poppers • Or as my
• Bacon Wrapped Jalapeño Poppers • Or as my husband calls them, Atomic Buffalo Turds! 🤷🏼‍♀️
🥓 
Regardless of the name, have you tried these? They are always a big hit when we host. Only 5 ingredients and easy to put together. We love to throw them on the smoker but in the oven works just as well. 
🌶 
Check out the recipe on the blog. Link in bio, search “jalapeño poppers” or
www.passionandpoppies.com/bacon-wrapped-jalapeño-poppers 
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#jalapeno #jalapenopoppers #bacon #appetizers #partyfood #cheese

• Whipped Coffee • Also known as Dalgona coffe
• Whipped Coffee • Also known as Dalgona coffee. Super creamy, delicious and has a sweetness that reminds me of sipping coffee with my dad in Kenya. 
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So yeah, this coffee has my heart!
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Super easy to make. I have the recipe on the blog if you’d like to give it a whirl. 
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Link in bio, search “whipped coffee” or
www.passionandpoppies.com/whipped-coffee
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#dalgonacoffee #whippedcoffee #coffee #coffeelover #heart #morning

Doing a little work outside today with my little s
Doing a little work outside today with my little sidekick. 
Jen, @cacoffeerepublic your latte and latte art is on point 🤎☕️🤎
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#latte #latteart #coffee #bujo #bulletjournal

These are the cutest and most delicious heart cake
These are the cutest and most delicious heart cakes! Shout out to Cat’s Cradle Creation! Thank you for your hard work and tasty talent! 
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Things don’t always seem to go accordingly. I knew I was going to be busy making Cocoa Bombs, and wasn’t going to make our own Valentine’s dessert. So I ordered these about a month in advance. 
And even thought I only gave the kids 3 small pieces of candy, we were lovingly gifted a ton of sweets. Plus Mikinzee decided she wanted to make a cake. Low and behold, these adorable cakes went uneaten, until today! After lunch treat!! And I really mean it when I say they are delicious! On top of the surprise Seafoam candy or honeycomb she sent me. Which is now my favorite candy. 😂 
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Check out @catscradle_creations for other delicious treats. You will NOT be disappointed!.
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#valentines #heartcake #treats #chocolate #cake

Happy Valentine’s Day!! I posted about Shirley T
Happy Valentine’s Day!! I posted about Shirley Temple’s earlier in the week, and have now landed on an adult Shirley Temple, say hello to Chample! Champagne and grenadine! 
I got the recipe from my mother-in-law, who got it from @foodtalkdaily. She calls it the “Valentini” and serves it in a martini glass, which was super cute. I however just got rid of my martini glass, they were tacky, so this is my version. My daughter didn’t mind the marshmallow fluff and sprinkle rim, but I’ll either do the sugar rim or not. Either way, something fun for the holiday ❤️🍒
And any reason to have champagne! 🙌🏼
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#champagne #shirleytemple #valentines #heart #celebrate #love

• Cauliflower Tacos • Tacos are a food group,
• Cauliflower Tacos • Tacos are a food group, right? 
“Feed me tacos, and tell me I’m pretty” Yeah, sounds about right! 
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If you haven’t tried cauliflower tacos, go do it, now! Can be as easy as sprinkling taco seasoning on the cauliflower, or a few more ingredients and voilà, amazing cauliflower tacos! If you haven’t checked out my blog post for cauliflower tacos, I highly recommend. It will not disappoint! In there is also the recipe for Chipotle Crema, and Picked Cabbage, that goes brilliantly with the tacos. 
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Link in bio and search “cauliflower tacos” or
www.passionandpoppies.com/Cauliflower-tacos 
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#tacos #tacosarelife #cauliflower #foodie #easyrecipes #easydinner

Good Morning ☀️ and Happy Friday! Enjoying the
Good Morning ☀️ and Happy Friday! Enjoying the chilly morning, drinking tea and taking time to sit and be. Not something I do often. 
My mind landed on friends/family that I haven’t seen in a long while. Some due to distance, some due to hectic grind, but mostly due to Covid. 
Friendships are a huge part of making life go round. This post is for them, I might not see you or talk to you as often as I’d like, regardless, I still love and miss you! ❤️
Who do you wish you were having tea or coffee with right now?
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#friends #friendship #teatime #coffeetime #relax #goodmorning

• Homemade Booch • Kombucha, like or dislike?
• Homemade Booch • Kombucha, like or dislike? I’m a huge fan!  But our last batch tasted a little more vinegary than I like. So this is me, suggesting to my husband @brendo, let’s make a new batch! 😘
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#booch #kombucha #fermentedfoods #raspberry #brewityourself

🎶Happy is as happy does, laugh and live with a
🎶Happy is as happy does, laugh and live with a half-full cup...🎶 - Kenny Chesney 
❤️
Two things:
1) If you ordered Cocoa Bombs from me, they are at the shop and ready for pick up, when ever you’re ready to get them. 
Check @thecrafthouse805 for store hours. 
Unless we’ve discussed other pick up arrangements.😘 
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2) Leopard print makes me happy 😍
🖤
Happy almost weekend! ❤️
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#cocoabombs #chocolate #chocolatewasted #valentines #hotchocolatebombs #happy

• Spinach and Lemon Linguine • Made this for d
• Spinach and Lemon Linguine • Made this for dinner last night if you caught my stories. Simple ingredients, easy to make and supper yummy! Definitely adding into the rotation. 
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Recipe up on the blog. Link in bio, search “linguine” or go to website:
www.passionandpoppies.com
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#linguine #pasta #lemon #spinach #easyrecipes #dinner #foodie

• Shirley Temple’s and Roy Roger’s • Bring
• Shirley Temple’s and Roy Roger’s • Brings back my childhood memories. I don’t know why, but whenever my parents would take us out for Mexican food, I would always order a Shirley Temple. So now the two go hand in hand. And now the girls do the same thing. 
We ordered lunch from our local Mexican restaurant and made our own Shirley Temple and Toy Rodger’s. 
Super simple! 7up/Coke, grenadine and cherries. 🍒 
When was the last time you had one of these?
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#shirleytemple #7up #coke #beverage #cherries #maraschino #memories

•Super Bowl Sunday • Who are you rooting for??
•Super Bowl Sunday • Who are you rooting for?? 
I’m rooting for champagne and food! Cheers to love and hearts!! ❤️ Go football! 🙌🏼
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What are you snacking on? 
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#superbowl #snacks #appetizers #caprese #valentines #hearts

Candles and Gnomes… These are a few of my favori
Candles and Gnomes... These are a few of my favorite things! 
7 day countdown to Valentine’s Day! Candles are at the shop and moving fast. Head over to the The Craft house and check out what prints there are and some other fun finds. Like the Valentine’s sign by @something.gray ❤️
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If you can’t make it into the shop, you can always message me if you’re interested. I also ship and can arrange porch pick ups. 
This photo also reminds me I need to make more gnomes.
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#candles #handpoured #soycandles #gnomes #maker #valentines #gifts

What’s your favorite fruit? I don’t think I co
What’s your favorite fruit? I don’t think I could pick one, but a ripe, locally or backyard grown strawberry is close to the top. 

We are lucky here in Ventura county to be surrounded by strawberry fields. So when strawberry season roll around, this Strawberry Sorbet is a must! It’s so delicious. 

Recipe is up on the blog when you’re ready to make it. I mean, why wait til strawberry season. We do have them in stores year around. 😘 And it will make a great Valentine’s dessert ❤️🤎

Link in Bio, just search strawberry sorbet on site. Or
www.passionandpoppies.com/strawberry-sorbet
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#sorbet #strawberry #icecream #homemade #dessert #valentines


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